Redefining MommyhoodJourney of a mom whose son is overcoming hypotonia

Every mom I know has read the What to Expect books, including myself. The pregnancy one was ok, although it did make me paranoid and worry about every little thing going wrong. The first year and toddler versions did nothing but make me worry, get angry & sad, and think I’m a horrible mother, or that my child is not “normal”. There is that dreaded word again! Any parent of a special needs child or a child with hypotonia should seriously burn these books!

I stopped reading the toddler version when my son was about 15 months old. That is around the time his pediatrician referred us to the neurologist and we self-referred to Early Intervention. Some of the behavioral issues still apply, but it’s not worth it for me to skim the book to find what I need because my eyes always drift to the “your child should be able to..” sections, then I’m upset all over again.

Maybe I should write a book for parents with kids with hypotonia??

One thing no one really tells you about before becoming a mom is all of the advice and opinions you hear once you have your precious bundle of joy.

Sometimes people actually offer constructive criticism, I mean advice. Other times, it makes me wonder if they are really just trying to push my buttons and be intentionally mean or judgmental.

With our situation, I’ve heard almost more than I can stand to hear. I’ve heard such ridiculous things like “oh, he doesn’t walk because you hold him too much and you don’t make him do anything.” Another great one: “all you do is hold him and nurse him.” Um, hello?!?! He’s a baby, that’s what they do.

For awhile, I would second-guess myself. After all, these opinions came from seasoned parents, so they should know right?? NO!!! Every mother and child is different and I’ve learned over time to trust my instincts and know that I’m the best mommy I can be (on most days anyway). I do still place some blame on myself though for not picking up on the cues sooner or getting him into therapy earlier. There is nothing I can do about that now. We have to live in moment and know that things will be ok.